Slow Down

Journaling Exercise for slowing down and reconnecting with your self

Human behavior is interesting. When I post something saying I am angry, I get so much response!

When I write articles of love and kindness… people are silent.

I try not to worry about what others are thinking. It is a hard effort, but I have to be accountable for my own thoughts and not the thoughts of others.

I wonder why people are so attracted to conflict. Why people can talk and talk and talk about the bad so much. It is a short conversation when you talk about all the good, it seems. No drama, no worry, no fear. Having a non-fear based conversation is rare. When do I not tell you what I am worried about?

I remember being in love. I remember when I met my husband, the sky couldn’t get any bluer. My love I felt consumed me. I talked about him all the time with such a smile on my face and my friends looked bored to hear about it so much. But when the drama started, they were all ears, right there by my side to bitch about it! I know because I have been that friend that lent that kind of support, too.

I am a better listener than I ever was before, thank goodness. It was not easy at first. I really had to watch people’s mouths when they talked, and their body language, to make sure I was paying attention. This was a part of a throat chakra exercise I created for myself after a bad ear infection. I even did a day of silence whenever I could, to become a better listener in and out.

SLOOOOWWWW DOWWWWN… don’t text too fast or write an email more than 5 lines long.

I try not to post too much about myself online or text beyond confirmations much that it would ever replace an actual connection to people. I am not afraid to pick up a phone and call, though I have found over the years certain friends will only reach out via text or a Facebook “like”. It’s not what I call support.

Or the “Hey, how is it going?” via text. not sure what I am supposed to write back. “I am having a rough time now, and here are all the details…” in a text message? It is better to respond, “if you have a moment to talk all me, I will be around”. I have done it before, and it works for those who really care.

SLOOOOWWW DOWWWWN… don’t jump to conclusions.

In these observations of people in my culture, I find myself asking, am I making a judgment or an actual factual conclusion? I am not sure, but I do know when I write my blogs and there is something in it that says I AM UNHAPPY, I get a lot more reads than when I say HERE IS THE KEY TO HAPPINESS.

Hey, it’s my blog so I will cry if I want to, but I always try to make sure that people know and understand that behind these emotions or experiences there is always an opportunity to GROW. To nurture my spirit no matter how broken or together it may feel. Life is ever-changing, and it’s really all about changing, isn’t it?

SLOOOOWWWW DOWWWWWN… enjoy an experience in the present and feel what you feel.

So, this past month I talked about how my yoga practice has gone very yin based in my studio newsletter. I enjoy just hanging out in a pose, making myself be present and going to my edge, while resting. My physical level of activity is up with working out, swimming with the kids and going to the playground, so I decided to cool it down.

I listened to myself when I got to what Ayurveda calls PITTA, or the fiery aspect of the human make up. When my PITTA is too high, I am easily aggravated, hard to focus and too intense.

So what is this mish mosh of stuff about today? Well, how about this; be kind to each other and listen to each other… you never know what is going on in someone’s life. Don’t ever assume that you do. Heck, half the time I don’t know what is going on in my life, since I am a poor listener to myself at times. That is until I sit and meditate or do yoga asana, breathe, or just spend time with the little people in my life, like my kids, who are filled with carefree energy. Life moves too fast some days. I am only truly observant of my behavior so much, so I have learned to TRY to slow down.

If you want to know something, or “what happened” or “why you look so blue”, ask and TRULY listen. If you don’t care enough to sit and listen and only care about the chatter, the “he said she said”, and the harmful part of the story, then you aren’t practicing your yoga and your best self. By asking, you are initiating “I am here to support you. Do you want me to just listen, or will it help to hear what I have to say?”. If the openness is there, offer up some loving kindness.

SLOOWWWWW DOWNNNN… don’t react so fast, and process.

If you don’t feel supported in your life, try this simple I AM SUPPORTED exercise. I just did this for myself recently and called a friend who I knew would tell me how it is, but also would present me with loving kindness so I could cool that PITTA down.

Write down what is bothering you, using this statement:

I do not feel supported in my life with my __________. End it the way that suits your needs. Write at least 10 I am not feeling supported in statements, and see where the path leads you.

Then try, I want to be supported in my life with my __________.  Do this 10 times.

Keep writing until you get to the real issue. Usually it is far from the original agitation.

Now invoke the 100% positive, I am supported in my life with my __________, and I have the power to create the changes I need.

Good luck. I truly honor you and where you are on your path. I know it will lead you to the right place…

Namaste,
Jennifer

 

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14 thoughts on “Slow Down

  1. Barbara P

    I love your posts, they always seem to come when I need someone to tell me that very thing. thanks so much

    Reply
  2. Mark Apone

    I love yin, it is one of my favorite yoga practices. I agree we need to slow down, we are always rushing to this or that, thinking about what we have to do next, and so on… Yin gives us the opportunity to just be in the present with our body and allow everything else to fade away. The discomfort from the stretch keeps pulling us back into the present, forcing us to slow down and pay attention to our body. It can really deepen our meditation, when we learn to embrace it.

    Reply
  3. Veronica

    Part of my yoga practice is definitely learning to listen. I have been able to listen to others..even what goes unsaid..but not to myself. I am just beginning to learn to listen to myself and posts like this help remind me to continue to do that. I’m also trying to find a balance of giving and receiving support so your support statements are helpful.

    Reply
  4. Anna

    Listening to others, myself and the universe has become a huge part of my practice. It’s a daily struggle to be present…my mind and body want to stay separate. There are days when my yoga practice is just sitting on my mat breathing and taking the time to enjoy the hot tea I’ve made myself. I just allow myself to feel connected.

    Reply
  5. Barbara

    Yoga has been such a blessing in my life. Came right when I asked and needed it. My doctor recommended it for me as I was always on the go, in my head and physically. I have learned and am learning to slow down. I like that you say to practice listening as well. I find when I’m in a hurry I can easily be looking at someone, nodding as they are talking, and not hearing a word they said because I am so busy in my mind. I have been working with this. Also, not to interrupt 🙂 I look forward to trying that exercise at the bottom. I wonder what will show up. Great article, great points!

    Reply
  6. JoAnna

    Life can swirl around at such a rapid, immediate pace that slowing down is often undervalued. It’s difficult for me to slow down, but necessary. I seem to be easily set out of balance so knowing when (and how) to slow down is essential to my well-being…it’s a work in progress, thank you for the reminder that slowing down is an important part of the process.

    Reply
  7. Maria D'Amico

    I 100% believe in the power of the written word to unlock what is truely going on inside of us. I will use this exercise to help me to heal my own life, and then pass it along to help others heal their’s.

    Reply
  8. Jen T

    Slow down, a work in progress.. I have often wondered why I don’t do this when it is necessary. I could write pages on this.

    Reply
  9. L Hartman

    I know that i need to slow down, but then i feel like i’ll never finish everything. I am definitely going to try the what’s bothering you exercise … This post also made me realize that i may have missed an attempt to connect when someone sent me a text (normally my preferred method of communication).

    Reply
  10. Jessica Sowers

    We are all busy, but it is important to take time for “human contact”! Not technology contact, lol! I am guilty of loving to text, but there are times that person to person is needed. However, I have found that several of my friends only want to get together when they have a problem. It is their “venting” session. I listen, offer support when appropriate, but…do they just need the drama reinforced? Especially when they are repeating the issue for the 3rd or 4th time? Difficult to stay in the moment and listen then! And when I would like to get together for fun or for no particular reason, they are typically not available…but, when they get the feeling that something isn’t going “right” for me…that’s when they want to meet. Is it to be supportive or to get the “dirt”? I’d like to believe its to be supportive, but that’s not really what my heart tells me. Sad, that so many of us have come to this!

    Reply
    1. Jennifer Langsdale Post author

      Sometimes it seems that yes, energetically our social circle is attracted to drama, so ask yourself, are they helping me in those moments or is my worst side coming out?

      Reply

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